1 of 4 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Anapol’s The 7 Natural Laws of Love – Student Responses: Alissa’s Take
The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process. It’s a great experience. We are reading amazing books. Thinking out of the box and across disciplines. Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions. In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.” Multiple perspectives and good synergy. Here, we offer a glimpse. Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Lawsof Love, was one of two introductory books. We got four responses: from Alissa, Rhiann, Adam, and John.
Deborah Anapol brings up a few points that I can agree with, but some of her laws do not make much sense or apply to my life. I agree with the argument that love is dependent upon trust, she believes that the more there is trust the more love will grow. This belief seems to make a lot of sense seeing as what is a relationship that is based on lies or loopholes. The more two people are able to share with each other the more open and willing to commit they will be. Trust is where many relationships hit a downward spiral because they cannot fully be truthful and accept their past. Although trust is an important part of love I do not think that always being truthful will lead to understanding.
A concept that confused me was the concept that love is always inside you and you cannot lose love, but you are love. The idea that love is not dependent upon other people I am skeptical of. Just because I am allowing love to embody me and allowing it into my life does not mean that I will feel loved. This may sound superficial but I do think love comes from other people and even sometimes material items. Getting a well thought out gift whether it has been made by hand or something that someone knew you wanted for a while, feels to me like love. It is not the gift that creates the love, but the thought behind it; the concept that someone knew you well enough to pick something or create something that fits you perfectly. I am unsure of whether I feel like love comes from other people due to the social constraints and the commercialized version of love seen in the media. The idea that love is always present within you is a concept to me that seems far-fetched.
The law of unity is the law that I see as being the most relevant because the concept of love to me includes everyone whether they believe it or not. Love does not discriminate based on background or social class, although some people feel as if they have never been loved. I understand that love in not tangible, but the acts of love, anywhere from a smile to a new car, are displays of love. I cannot wrap my head around the idea that if someone wishes to be loved and opens themselves to being loved, that they will feel loved. The concept of love that society created which makes the most sense to me requires at least two people to create this bond. I think that author was successful from the viewpoint that she brought up relatable concepts and characteristics, but I do not tend to follow her whole argument.
Does the law of source imply that you love yourself more than you can love another being? Can you love another being according to this law?
Is listening to your heart over other beliefs and morals the honorable route to choose?
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love. Education is the heart of democracy, education to love. Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday. Book Reports scheduled every other Thursday. Check out our summer offerings: Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21. Info and Registration here!
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia,Eros, and many other books about love Professor of Humanities