1 of 3 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Margulis and Sagan’s Symbiotic Planet – Student Responses: Alexandra’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Lynn Margulis and Dorion Sagan’s Symbiotic Planet was one of two theory-of-science books.  We got three responses: from Alexandra, John, and Adam.  

Here’s Alexandra‘s take:

Response to Lynn Margulis and Dorion Sagan’s Symbiotic Planet: A New Look at Evolution  

As an English major, I am not too fond of science. I did briefly go through a phase in which I was a marine biology enthusiast, grasping at any information on oceans and the creatures that inhabit them, but after that brief explosion of passion, I retired science for pencil and paper and books-lots and lots of books. I have tried since to ignite a spark for biology once more, and have failed, and failed, and failed. Symbiotic Planet, however, strikes my fancy.
            Now, I am not saying that science will once more possess me due to this book. I am only pointing out the fact that Symbiotic Planet appeals to people who aren’t science based through its use of poetic language and beautiful facts, as well as it’s mix of hard science and personal experience.
            The author, Lynn Margulis, places stunning excerpts at the start of each chapter. Whilst reading through the book, my mind attempts to connect these whimsical words with the theme of each chapter. This search for connection makes reading the more monotonous (at least in my eyes) scientific facts interesting. I have not yet found many feasible links, but I am intrigued.
            Furthermore, I find Lynn Margulis’ emphasis on the interconnectedness of all life forms to be beautiful. Awe-stricken by the perfect dependence of the earth’s species on each other, I can’t help but to inhale the author’s words. The idea that symbiosis has such a profound effect on evolution, on the now, and the future, is almost spiritual. Despite the endless wars, the disgusting ways in which we slaughter animals, and the general cruelty of a variety of species, including the homo sapiens, the children of the earth-the fish, the bugs, the lions, humans- must depend on each other to further evolution and therefore to enhance the planet.
            This idea intertwined with the theory titled Gaia, forms an elaborate web of beauty. Looking at the earth as a living organism, further connects every being on this planet, for in Gaian theory, every species is part of earth, and is thus part of the same organism. By viewing all species as one, humans strengthen their link with nature. This thought is a powerful one, for it has the power to spur a movement of care. If we believe that humans share something innate with the earth, will we not cease to destroy it and her creatures? I believe that a dearth of emphasis on individuality, specifically the idea that humans are higher or better or just different than the rest of Mother Earth’s creatures, will decrease our craving for money and other superfluous things. My belief stems from the idea that when we link ourselves with the grandeurs of nature, we will realize how insignificant we, as humans, are. This feeling of insignificance however is not painful or detrimental. It instead is beautiful, for it gives perspective. It places shifts our focus from greed and ambition to the things that really matter, such as the well being of others, kindness, and happiness.
            To digress from the above rant, I will now write of a statement I found especially intriguing. Lynn Margulis speaks of how a “modern woman must be almost octopoid in her attention if she is to survive. Holding the infant in one arm… she stirs the pot with the other, while she watches the toddler”(18). This statement leads me to the following questions:
            Do you agree with this claim?
            What does this mean for women, working or not, of today?
            Why do women feel the need to balance everything?
            Why is not acceptable for women to focus only on one thing? 

Alexandra Mayer
Published with permission


WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports scheduled every other Thursday.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Info and Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

4 of 4 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Anapol’s The 7 Natual Laws of Love – Student Responses: John’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love, was one of two introductory books.  We got four responses: from Alissa, Rhiann, Adam, and John.  

Here’s John‘s take:

Response to Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love
  

–>

Contrary to others’ expectations, I liked this book and not just because it had footnotes and all. (The difference being that Dr. Anapol is talking about esoteric topics here. You can talk about esoteric things all you want without citing statistics or sources but it certainly helps; Weiss was declaring numbers and scientific experiments without actually saying where she got her information from before making alarmist claims). I really like the idea of applying spirituality to solving material problems. Thich Nhat Hanh, His Holiness Dalai Lama XIV, and Aang Sun Suu Kyi are all on board with this idea, all of them subscribing to Engaged Buddhism.
I really have no criticisms of this book. I think it’s an interesting philosophy. It’s one that she not arrives logically and experientially, but also provides Exercises to put her Laws into practice (something a lot of philosophers fail to do).
That said, it was something of an emotional read. Dr. Anapol writes on pg. 20,
… sometimes people have the experience of hearing the words ‘I love you’ but inwardly feeling the words are a lie. Instead of trusting the gut feeling, they believe they should feel loved. They may judge themselves for not being open to the love or decide that they are damaged and unable to tolerate being loved. If they later learn their intuition was accurate, they may go on to become mistrustful of others and doubt that the words and the love could ever be congruent.
I’ve experienced this in different forms. My mother, for example, was so sensitive to the tiny phrase “I love you” that she wouldn’t even allow the word “hate” in the house (in any context) saying that it would invite us to hate each other. She once accused me of loving our dog more than her, which made it difficult to respond, “I love you.” Accusing is typically not a loving action.
The same thing happened with my relationship a year ago. The woman I was in love with encouraged me to say those words as if they held a certain magical power. Apparently the only power they held was to unravel the relationship. As soon as we said them to each other, our relationship fell apart. My friends remember that time saying I was “less than a month away from alcohol poisoning.” I’m still trying to work through the exact definition of “love” and this book helped me move past that incident just a little bit.
Obviously, I found a lot of stuff in this book that directly applied to my own experiences. My most recent relationship ended just before reading this book. We hadn’t spoken in days precisely because we didn’t know how to talk to each other any more. Our conversations always became offensive or taken in the wrong context. We slowly retreated from each other because we were always walking on pins and needles. Finally, when we finally decided that we needed to address our communication issue, we became completely honest with each other, explained our hurts and attempts at communication and why we were so unresponsive, there was a strong connection that suddenly developed and breaking up seemed like a horrible idea, but a necessary one. Then this line on page 78 hit home,
Have you ever noticed that whenever someone honestly expresses whatever they are feeling – with no blame, defensiveness, self-deception or hidden agenda – you feel a surge of love? Even if what’s been said is not what you wanted to hear, the very act of vulnerable self-disclosure draws love like a magnet.
This is the perfect description of what happened between us. It’s something that I’m not sure I would have been able to fully understand without experiencing it first hand, and I’m very happy I did.
I really enjoyed reading this book and feel like I need to go through it a second time to digest fully the experiences Dr. Anapol had with these spiritual masters.
Questions for Discussion:
1.     Did you find any quotes that you might not have understood without experiencing them first?
2.     Are there “types” of love? For example, is there an inherent difference between the parent/child love and what one would experience during an intimate sexual relationship? 

John Nitowski
Published with permission


WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports scheduled every other ThursdayCheck out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Info and Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

3 of 4 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Anapol’s The 7 Natural Laws of Love – Student Responses: Adam’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love, was one of two introductory books.  We got four responses: from Alissa, Rhiann, Adam, and John.  

Here’s Adam‘s take:

Response to Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love
  


I found “The Seven Natural Laws of Love”, by Deborah Anapol, to be a pleasant surprise. I am an emotional person, but I prefer to put up a stoic front and regard talk of love from a distance. Needless to say, I started this book with trepidation, but that dissipated almost immediately. Anapol writes in a warm, relaxing manner about topics which make many people, myself included, uncomfortable, and she succeeds at getting the reader to let down their guard.

            One thing I found truly pleasant about the book was that each chapter, in addition to articulately, if not somewhat fancifully, exploring the seven laws of love, had exercises for the reader to undertake. I performed some of them over the course of the week, and found them to be eye-opening. This interactive quality made the book more entertaining and animated.

            I will say though that I did not really feel a deep connection to Anapol’s book. I felt rather unrepresented; the target audience being young, heterosexual women, I felt overlooked by Anapol’s study and research – as if it did not truly apply to me, being a non-heterosexual male. My view of love also differs from Anapol’s. I do not disagree with much of what she says and believes; in fact, I completely agree with many of her main points, some of which being that the true source of love is one’s self and that truth and forgiveness are essential for a loving relationship. However, I got the sense that Anapol views love as a deeply spiritual, ethereal enigma. I view love, more or less, as a flood of hormones, some of which being dopamine and serotonin, and various psychological attachments. I am not a very spiritual person – I do not believe that Anapol’s view of love is wrong and mine is right, and I am not trying to undermine the importance of love. I am merely saying that her phrasing of love and her experiences seemed, in a way, foreign to me.

            All that said, I am glad that I read The Seven Natural Laws of Love. It was enjoyable, and I walk away with some very practical, true, useful advice and knowledge.

Adam Kocurek
Published with permission


WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports scheduled every other Thursday.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Info and Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

5 of 9 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Book Reports – Polyamory in the 21st Century: John’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are expanding horizons with clustered reading: Theory of Science, Cultural Theory, Ecological TheoryWe each read related books, then report to group.  More thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their book reports in.  In class, we connect the dots. From a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  What’s the connection with our clustered themes?  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Deborah Anapol’s Polyamory in the 21st Century is one of five “Cultural Theorybooks.  We got John to report on it.  

John Nitowski:  
A Book Report on Polyamory in the 21st Century: Love and Intimacy with Multiple Partners
by Deborah Anapol

–>

Dr. Anapol’s book Polyamory in the 21st Century takes a more academic tone than her other book The Seven Natural Laws of Love, but draws from the same sources. Dr. Anapol practices polyamory and has a lot of connections (professional and otherwise) with other polyamorists. Through mostly interviews, with some statistical research, Dr. Anapol presents the full picture of polyamory: the good and the bad.
To clarify, “polyamory” is the practice of being openly intimate with more than one person at a time. It’s different from cheating on one’s spouses (because transparency is always a factor) and from swinging (because “swinging” in current connotations implies strictly physical relationships, though there is a strong connection to classical swinging and modern polyamory). As Dr. Anapol defines it, “I use the word polyamory to describe a whole range of lovestyles that arise from an understanding that love cannot be forced to flow or be prevented from flowing in any particular direction. Love, which is allowed to expand, often grows to include a number of people. But to me, polyamory has more to do with an internal attitude of letting love evolve without expectations or demands that it look a particular way than it does with the number of partners involved,” (1). Many polyamorous people come to the conclusion that, “lifelong monogamy is more of a mirage than a reality,” (2). The “monogamy mirage” is something of a product of modern society. It seems to produce dysfunctional families so while many people actively seek out polyamorous relationships, “most inadvertently discover that polyamory provides a very fertile environment for replicating any dysfunctional patterns carried over from the parental triangle experienced in their family of origin,” (20).
Somewhat shockingly, she opens the book with, “I have always characterized my position on polyamory as pro-choice rather than antimonogamy,” (ix). Dr. Anapol establishes that she is not out to convert us all to be polyamorists. Rather, she is here to show her readers that it is a viable alternative to serial monogamy. Of course a few pages later she writes, “In all honesty, after twenty-five years as a relationship coach, seminar leader, and participant observer in the polyamory community, I’m not at all sure that polyamory can fulfill its potential for sustainable intimacy,” (xv). It would seem that Dr. Anapol is apprehensive about the possibilities polyamory supposedly promises for society (more peaceful, more loving, more open, etc.) but reading the book a little closer reveals something different.
In Chapter 4 “The Ethics of Polyamory,” Dr. Anapol tells a story regarding a foursome under the heading “Unhealthy Monogamy leads to Unhealthy Polyamory,” (82). The story concerns two couples that got together to form a foursome: Vic and Christy met Alice and Jack at a party. They soon started a polyamorous relationship. While Christy and Jack developed “a sexual chemistry so strong that it was nearly palpable,” Vic was concerned that Christy would leave him for Jack, (83). When their foursome broke up, Christy and Vic were fine and had a thriving monogamous relationship. But the jealousy and pain was still apparent, Alice and Jack divorced not long after the event.
This episode highlights one of Dr. Anapol’s realizations about polyamory: “the form of the relationship is not so important… the form can change at any time. What accounts is allowing love to dictate the form rather than attempting to force love into whatever mold the mind has decided it right,” (ix-x). Like Diamond in Sexual Fluidity, Anapol seems to posit a sort of “relationship fluidity.” She includes lots of relationship combinations, for example, polygamy, polygyny, polyandry, group marriages, triads, dyads, Vs (where A dates B and C, but B and C aren’t dating), and Ns (where A and B are dating, but A dates C, and B dates D, but they aren’t dating anyone else). Polyamory is worthless if we can’t take the lessons we assume it promotes: open intimacy (sexual and emotional), a larger realm of love, decreased jealousy in favor of compersion, etc.
The chapter I was most interested to read was 7: “Polyamory and Children.” Whenever I ask monogamists what the purpose of marriage is, they tend to respond, “For the protection of children. Without laws in place, there’s nothing to keep fathers from just walking out,” (ironically, I heard this exact wording from a father). Not only does that sound absolutely absurd, that the instinct of fatherhood is held only in place by arbitrary laws, but I’ve seen too many parents who did walk out on their children. And not just fathers, but mothers as well. This isn’t to say monogamy is inherently bad, any more than Dr. Anapol shows the reader with her book that polyamory is not inherently good. But when it concerns raising children, the only advantage seems to be convenience. Several times in the book, Dr. Anapol expresses how nice it is to be able to go somewhere intimate with a partner and know her small children were well cared for at home. Otherwise, there don’t seem to be any actual beneficial or detrimental effects from raising children in a polyamorous home. Among the many stories Dr. Anapol includes, a woman describes her polyamorous lifestyle’s effect on her son, “I hear of the ups and downs of his relationships, just like any normal young man. So while I would like to say that our sexualoving lifestyle saved him such grief, I see that is not so. On the other hand, he sees the slings and arrows of his love life as part of his spiritual path, and I also notice that he truly honors his girlfriends and maintains friendships with odd lovers. As a mother, then, I do not worry about him,” (135). So really, she’s just describing a well-adjusted young man. Not that these are absent from monogamous relationships, but it stands to reason that polyamory’s emphasis on communication, openness, honesty, and a deeper understanding of unconditional love translates well to children.
This book is a great addition to our list (and I’m somewhat surprised it wasn’t required). I remember reading one story in Sexual Fluidity where a woman, not using any specific label to define herself, said she loved to date men because of the intensity, but loved dating women because of the intimacy. When she was with a woman, she missed the intensity of her male partners, but when she was with men, she missed the intimacy of her male partners. After reading the story, I wondered why she couldn’t have both and just be polyamorous? I think Dr. Anapol would ask the same question.
One of the more unexpected aspects to me (that I believe relates more immediately to concepts of Ecosexuality) is the way Osho looked at relationships. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, better known by his followers as Osho, was a spiritual guru in the ‘70s and ‘80s. He developed spiritual communes in Pune, India and Oregon. Osho praised “conscious monogamy as a very evolved form of relationship” however, “he was a severe critic of the traditional family, saying that it was ‘no longer relevant for the new humanity that was being born,’” (152). In Osho’s commune, children belonged to the community, and in order to expand awareness, adult sexual relationships were to be shared and free to prevent negative forms of attachment, what we would call jealousy, (93).
For me, this book was an incredible contrast to my own monogamous, Judeo-Christian upbringing. In school, I was told that “sex exists, and here’s all of the diseases you can get from it, also pregnancy.” In Osho’s ashram, the philosophy was that teenage sex, “was the most innocent, the most raw and pure of sexual experiences,” and that it, “could help to blossom people into sexually loving adults when it was not thwarted and laden with fear and moral judgment or hidden in secrecy and shame,” (152-3). Even though our society (as many of the books interviewed subjects have pointed out) seems to be content with the loneliness, despair, and depression that serial monogamy produces, I have not been. I was raised with three seemingly permanent parents who’ve had their ups and downs and saw several secondary father figures come and go. How very different can polyamory be for raising children if that’s our main concern? What is the advantages jealousy produces in a society so already laden with conflict, corruption, and envy?
Dr. Anapol’s book is academic in its approach, but poetic in execution. She is able to show how the philosophy behind having multiple sexualoving partners can open the doors to a more compersive and peaceful society. Dr. Anapol actually references Gaia and the New Politics of Love and describes how polyamory is conducive to the Gaia hypothesis. Patriarchal values (and it should be noted that much of what passes for polyamory is really old fashioned patriarchal polygyny, much of Mormon and Muslim sanctioned polygamy falls under this category) often place female dependence on male hegemony “over symbiosis or interdependence and direct bodily awareness,” (234). If we are able to begin practicing polyamory, not as a method of sexual gratification, but as an opening of awareness and love, as Osho proposed, then we can practice the arts of love in a sustainable way and open the doors to a loving society. 

John Nitowski
 Published with permission


WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Book Reports to appear every other Thursday.  Book Reports to be scheduled soon.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

2 of 4 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Anapol’s The 7 Natural Laws of Love – Student Responses: Rhiann’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love, was one of two introductory books.  We got four responses: from Alissa, Rhiann, Adam, and John.  

Here’s Rhiann‘s take:

Response to Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love
  

–>

The Seven Natural Laws of Love is a text that I am generating an abundance of connections to. I appreciate the exercises scattered amongst the pages. Each one helped me to connect to the text. The exercise and section that I connected with most is the Longing for Love section in Chapter Two: The Law of Source. I have always wondered why it seems that I long for love more than my peers around me. Anapol explained longing in an analogy with fine chocolates. She wrote, “if you have never tasted chocolate, you do not crave it. Once you have sampled its delights, you want more. And once you’ve had fine chocolate, nothing less will satisfy you.” This analogy reassured me that indeed I have been deeply in love before and explained to me that this is why I will not settle for anything less.

            The second piece to this puzzle is that a longing for great love merely activates our quest. However, the quest to find this in someone else is not the answer. Chapter two explained that one must look for this love within themselves. The realization that, “ you feel love when you are being loving, not when you are being loved by another” is valuable. Before reading this text, I was aware of this. Recently, I have committed to guiding myself towards the person I was when I had been in love before in hopes to find it again. I started with self adjustments after hearing the age old quote along the lines of no one will love you until you love yourself. I have changed my diet and exercise habits to find peace with my body. I have started listening to the music I used to like the most. I have started therapy to work on my emotional issue. The list goes on and on. Strangely enough after a short time, I already feel like I am returning to the state of being I was in when I was my most happiest and in love. Even more strangely enough an intimate relationship seemingly just landed at my feet. My recent experiences and this section of the text have truly proved to me that I am love. Love is within me. To have the love I have been longing for since the first time I tasted it, I have to be love, and be in love with myself to be in love with others.

            The exercise in this section also really inspired me. It essentially instructed you to convince yourself that you already possess the love in which you seek and to practice this exercise when you feel that yearning. I definitely am going to continue to use this exercise. In terms of discussion, I would love to know if others were also inspired by this section. Do you think the exercise is valuable? Also, who amongst us is steadfast in their love that they have for themselves and others?

Rhiann Peterson
Published with permission


WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports to be scheduled soon.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Info and Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

1 of 4 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Anapol’s The 7 Natural Laws of Love – Student Responses: Alissa’s Take

Dear Earthlings:


The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love, was one of two introductory books.  We got four responses: from Alissa, Rhiann, Adam, and John.  

Here’s Alissa‘s take:

Response to Deborah Anapol’s The Seven Natural Laws of Love

  
Deborah Anapol brings up a few points that I can agree with, but some of her laws do not make much sense or apply to my life. I agree with the argument that love is dependent upon trust, she believes that the more there is trust the more love will grow. This belief seems to make a lot of sense seeing as what is a relationship that is based on lies or loopholes. The more two people are able to share with each other the more open and willing to commit they will be. Trust is where many relationships hit a downward spiral because they cannot fully be truthful and accept their past. Although trust is an important part of love I do not think that always being truthful will lead to understanding.

            A concept that confused me was the concept that love is always inside you and you cannot lose love, but you are love. The idea that love is not dependent upon other people I am skeptical of. Just because I am allowing love to embody me and allowing it into my life does not mean that I will feel loved. This may sound superficial but I do think love comes from other people and even sometimes material items. Getting a well thought out gift whether it has been made by hand or something that someone knew you wanted for a while, feels to me like love. It is not the gift that creates the love, but the thought behind it; the concept that someone knew you well enough to pick something or create something that fits you perfectly. I am unsure of whether I feel like love comes from other people due to the social constraints and the commercialized version of love seen in the media. The idea that love is always present within you is a concept to me that seems far-fetched.

            The law of unity is the law that I see as being the most relevant because the concept of love to me includes everyone whether they believe it or not. Love does not discriminate based on background or social class, although some people feel as if they have never been loved. I understand that love in not tangible, but the acts of love, anywhere from a smile to a new car, are displays of love. I cannot wrap my head around the idea that if someone wishes to be loved and opens themselves to being loved, that they will feel loved. The concept of love that society created which makes the most sense to me requires at least two people to create this bond. I think that author was successful from the viewpoint that she brought up relatable concepts and characteristics, but I do not tend to follow her whole argument. 

Questions:

Does the law of source imply that you love yourself more than you can love another being? Can you love another being according to this law?

Is listening to your heart over other beliefs and morals the honorable route to choose?


Alissa Maus
Published with permission

WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports scheduled every other ThursdayCheck out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Info and Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

 

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

4 of 9 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Book Reports – Future without War: Rhiann and Alissa’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are expanding horizons with clustered reading: Theory of Science, Cultural Theory, Ecological TheoryWe each read related books, then report to group.  More thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their book reports in.  In class, we connect the dots. From a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  What’s the connection with our clustered themes?  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse. Lynn Dieter Duhm’s Future without War is one of five Cultural Theory books.  We got Rhiann and Alissa to report on it.  

Rhiann Peterson and Alissa Maus:  
A Book Report on Future without War. Theory of Global Healing.
by Dieter Duhm

–>

Question: How was your experience reading this book in the context of an Ecosexuality course? How does the book’s content relate to the themes and questions of the course?

            Future without War by Dieter Duhm directly correlates with the concepts and ideas expressed in ecosexuality. The author focuses on how there is a possibility to have a future without war, but the only way to do so would be to heal the Earth as a whole. When pain occurs somewhere in the world it spreads because it is an interconnected whole as expressed in Gaia theory. The issues humans have with each other and within themselves causes hurt in the rest of society. Duhm believes that his Peace Villages and Healing Biotopes are the first step in order to get rid of war and create universal peace. These Peace Villages would have new organisms that would have no race, religion, culture, language, possessions, and etc. to define or shelter their opinions and views. These communities will hold people who are open minded and spread harmony to the rest of the world. “Those who are our enemies today may have been our friends before. Those who are our friends today may have been our enemies before” (Duhm 14).  Duhm makes the point that all people have suffered at some point and when one person suffers the world suffers with them. Because all people are connected by the Earth and Gaia theory when people harbor lies it can spread as hatred elsewhere.

            Duhm explains that war is a concept rooted in society and that even before war has begun it has been planned because it has been so ingrained in the culture.  He explains because we do not understand that war is such a piece of our society that people unknowingly contribute to war by ways as simple as just being a consumer. He ties his theory on a future without war with ecosexuality by explaining how each person is just an organ in the organism as a whole. Each person is connected to Gaia and is a piece of a puzzle that makes the system work as a whole.  He currently believes that, “the existing culture is an operating system of dominance, fear, and violence” (Duhm 23). In order to transform from what its current state a new society needs to be created free of influence with a new set of rules, establishing society as a whole. A generalization of his twelve rules of Tamera (Biotope) are as follows: One’s behavior must reflect healing and peace, both inner and outer. Resonate within and do not make any unneeded noise as it will disrupt the harmony. One must be trustworthy, truthful, supportive, and actively participate. On shall not suppress their sexual attractions but in doing so they must understand the idea of free sexuality and must not force others to satisfy their sexual needs. They have no right to possess people for example a husband, wife or child. The people in this community must attend certain events such as spiritual hours or training events for the younger generations. Duhm states also that one’s actions reflect on the lives of all people. His last rule is that one should continually build up energy in order to conserve it for later use. These concepts would create a community in which peace would overcome war, and where peace prevails it would be able to spread since the world is all connected and a part of Gaia.

            The comparison that Duhm uses is that when a person cuts their finger, the cells immediately begin the healing process as should humans be able to heal the Earth that they are a part of. He also uses the idea that when someone thinks they are getting fat their brain automatically formulates an image of them fat. He believes that if people’s bodies are capable of acting this way then humans should be able to act in the same manner in healing the Earth. This has recently been hindered due to the fact that many people in todays society believe that war is a necessity to society because of the dominant role it has taken in politics and economics. If we adapt to these Biotopes then there is a possibility that people will no longer need to be fearful of war, hatred and violence but rather they would just have to love.

            Another one of his principles that further coincides with Gaia theory is the idea that whatever is happening at one place is happening everywhere in the world because when something happens holowaves are sent out that send vibrations everywhere. He focuses on the concepts of frequencies that are sent out, so one thing a person does can affect someone in another part of the world. Duhm believes that our world is based upon information and that information controls the lives society leads. People need to download information on peace rather than war to create a future without war.

            Duhm mentions 5 key thoughts that outline the theory of global healing. In short they are the following; The entire Earth and all of humanity is a holistic system and can be considered one organism. In this first point, Duhm mentions how one single thought can change one’s whole inner life. One peace thought can shift our thinking and in turn shift other’s thinking. The second point illustrates that community, truth, trust, love, eros, and religion hold the keys to a world and life without violence. The third thought expands on the idea of trust as the centre of peacework. Duhm goes as far as to say that “peace is TRUST” and that “trust is the deepest human experience of all” (Duhm 63). Duhm also explains how healing biotopes work to generate trust by creating a place with favorable conditions and encouraging conscious work and effort in cultivating permanent trust. The fourth point illustrates that individual transformations are not what transforms a community. “Communal and societal structures that have yet to be created” will make it possible for truth and growth (Duhm 63). The fifth and final point suggests that the communities of the future will be responsible for developing the new societal structures needed to elicit change and promote a future without war. The more emphasis on Earth as holistic system will reverberate and create a new code of life for this planet.

            Another illustration Duhm included in his proposal for a future without war was the parable of the nut. In this metaphor, or parable, the nut is pregnant with it’s core. When the core arrives or is unveiled and shocks its audiences, a revelation occurs. In other words, “the becomes visible at more and more places on Earth – unveiling occurs. The unveiling makes it possible for us to take a look inside the nut” and realize the “prehistoric utopia” (Duhm 71). “Revelation means that the world goes from the implicit to explicit order. It changes from the latent state of its possibilities into the manifest states of its possibilities. A reality that so far exists as a latent reality, slowly manifests. the image of  “prehistoric utopia” becomes visible” (Duhm 72). Overall, the basic premise behind this explanation of the parable of the nut is that traditional society is the shell and the nut is is the ripe seed of new society that has yet to come.

            Another way to contemplate the future without war is through a virtual space station in the “noosphere”, also known as the mental and spiritual world. The virtual space station is almost a futuristic and more developed projection of what already exists in Tamera. It is important to realize that the term virtual does not necessarily mean computer generated but rather virtual means latent, possible, and conquerable futuristic goals of development. Additionally, the virtual space station is a way of looking at our own possibilities for holistic happiness. The virtual space station is a vision which is ignited by the power of thought and “always accompanied by conscientious material work, research, and implementation” (Duhm 78). Duhm notes that “the virtual space station is a dream, but it is a realistic one” (Duhm 80).

            As the text develops, Duhm begins to offer up the concept of solutions. He starts by quoting the architect Le Corbusier, “You do not start a revolution by fighting the state, but by presenting the solution” (Duhm 86). From here, Duhm proceeds to explain that problems can not be solved at the level in which they lie. He relates this to examples of love and technology and suggests that we need a higher level of order. He suggests that functioning communities with functioning spiritual systems provide a place where two lovers can meet and when they meet it will be a purely positive way. From here, Duhm goes on to elaborate on many types of energy. He touches on technical, solar, and emotional energy before suggesting the switch from fossil fuels to solar and cosmic energy. He notes that “we must switch from depletable to inexhaustible sources of energy” (Duhm 90). He dreams of a movement that is not characterized or complicated by scarcity and further assumes that all living things feel the same way.

As Future Without War winds down, Duhm explains the Monte Cerro experiment. The project is set in Tamera, Portugal and is focussed on understanding and developing effective peace villages. The project is meant to represent a global aspect in two regards; economy of globalization and new world order. Their main objectives are to discover how the world can be healed and absent of violence by imposing these goals on themselves within their new community. In three years, students are expected to come up with how they can heal world suffering and urged to start with themselves and their community members. The experiment connects the students to their natural surroundings as they coexist within their environment. Additionally, art is also mentioned as an important aspect of the experiment. Duhm includes a list of thought provoking questions regarding the Monte Cerro experiment that open opportunities for dialogue and contemplation.

In conclusion, Future Without War utilizes Tamera and the Monte Cerro experiment to demonstrate the possibilities for a nonviolent future filled with peace and trust. The main topics of sexuality, love, and partnership are seen throughout the text and provide a direct connection to the Ecosexuality movement. 

Alissa Maus and Rhiann Peterson
Published with permission

WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Book Reports to appear every other Thursday.  Book Reports to be scheduled soon.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

6 of 6 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Weiss’s EcoSex – Student Report: Michael’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Stefanie Iris Weiss’s EcoSex: Go Green Between the Sheets, was one of two introductory books.  We got five responses: from John, Alex, Adam, Rhiann, Alissa, and Michael.  

Here’s Michael’s take:

Response to Stefanie Iris Weiss’s EcoSex: Go Green Between the Sheets

–>

I found EcoSex: Go Green Between the Sheetsto be an interesting introduction to the eco-sexual movement. The first thing that struck me generally about the book was that Stephanie Iris Weiss wrote it very directly with a primarily female gendered audience in mind. This intrigued me because this is something that I had never consciously thought about in a book that I had read.
As to the actual content of the book, I found most of her discussion of harmful chemicals and science came from a reasonable footing given my experience in science classes. However, within the section on “Scent and Sensibility” in Chapter 2, I thought the Weiss’s writing was sensationalist to a degree because she uses the term volatile organic compound (VOCs) to demonize the chemical fragrance of perfumes. While I agree with Weiss’s criticism of secretive “proprietary blends” from mainstream perfumers, I felt that the broad use of the term VOCs was problematic because it gives the impression that all of these compounds are harmful when it is just the subset of synthetic ones that are. The aromatics and DIY alternatives she describe all contain VOCs as well because all scents we are capable of detecting are because of VOCs and I think it misinforms the layman reader into possibly thinking all of these compounds may be harmful.
In addition, with many of the products she recommends, Weiss stresses the importance of buying them in the organic variety. While supporting organic products is definitely a good thing, I would have liked a discussion of the eco-friendly trade-off between buying local non-organic products and organic products that require burning oil to ship them long distances. Similarly, I would have liked her to bring up the environmental harms of lithium mining in her discussion of hybrid vehicles and technology.
Questions
1)    Is it more important to buy a local product that may not be organically certified or a product that has to be shipped a long distance but that is organic?
2)    How do you think technology and our society’s mantra of recycling electronics on a biannual basis fits into the eco-sexual lifestyle?
3)     How much of the advice and tips in the book do you plan to incorporate into your own life? 

Michael Maranets
Published with permission

WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports to be scheduled soon.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

5 of 6 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Weiss’s EcoSex – Student Responses: Adam’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are reading amazing books.  Thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their responses in, with discussion questions.  In class, we connect the dots: a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Stefanie Iris Weiss’s EcoSex: Go Green Between the Sheets, was one of two introductory books.  We got five responses: from John, Alex, Adam, Rhiann, Alissa, and Michael.  

Here’s Adam’s take:

Response to Stefanie Iris Weiss’s EcoSex: Go Green Between the Sheets
I found “Eco-Sex: Go Green Between the Sheets and Make Your Love Life Sustainable”, by Stefanie Iris Weiss, to be a very interesting, informative manual, if you will. The book is very well written, and done so in such a way that the author maintains a conversational tone while upholding a sense of authority and, in some cases, even severity. This writing style makes reading effortless and kept me captivated.

 In addition to being composed eloquently and effectively, Weiss touches upon, examines, and reflects upon some real problems and conundrums we all face, and offers meaningful, realistic answers. It is difficult, in this day and age, to live a completely green, vegan lifestyle, but “Eco-Sex, Go Green Between the Sheets” makes the possibility infinitely more feasible by providing practical advice and expansive lists of ‘green’ companies, recipes, products, etc.

One of the things I learned and found most interesting is how companies attempt to ‘greenwash’ their names and products. I did not know the full extent to which companies will blatantly lie and mislead consumers about the environmental-friendliness of their products and practices, and I did not fully know how inept we, as patrons, and our government, as a regulator, are at reigning in these practices. Weiss’s argument, that our synthetic, chemical-laced, inorganic, excessively consumptive lifestyles are to account for many of our ailments and environmental issues, is well founded, and discussed ad nauseam throughout the book.

 I found myself feeling very critical of myself and my routines as I read further into the text. I always considered myself to be an aware, conservative, conscious consumer, and I always recycle everything I can and have a vegetarian diet. However, after reading this book, I feel as though that is not truly enough. My discussion questions are thus: in what aspects were you living ‘greenly’ before this book, and what, if anything, do you plan on changing after reading it?

Adam Kocurek

Published with permission

WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Students Responses to appear every Tuesday.  Book Reports to be scheduled soon.  Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com

3 of 9 – EcoSex @ U Conn – Book Reports – Lichtenfels’s Temple of Love: Alex’s Take

Dear Earthlings:

The EcoSex course at U Conn is in process.  It’s a great experience.  We are expanding horizons with clustered reading: Theory of Science, Cultural Theory, Ecological TheoryWe each read related books, then report to group.  More thinking out of the box and across disciplines.  Students are sending their book reports in.  In class, we connect the dots. From a holograph of what we’ve read together, the “required readings.”  What’s the connection with our clustered themes?  Multiple perspectives and good synergy.  Here, we offer a glimpse.  Sabine Lichtenfels‘s Temple of Love is one of five “Cultural Theorybooks.  We got Alex to report on it.  

Alexandra Mayer:  
A Book Report on Temple of Love: A Journey into the Age of Sensual Fulfillment
by Sabine Lichtenfels
 

Temple of Love seems to be a handbook for EcoSexuality. The author, Sabine Lichtenfels, favors free love, arguing that free love exists for the “reconnection and re-entry to greater contexts of information and communication”(55). In this she means that free love is universal love. A person should not hoard their love, but should let it flow naturally. This in turn will link the loving individual with all of nature and Mother Earth herself. She claims that personal love is selfish, and makes a good point that it often stems from the yearning for possession. Often, males want to own females, and control them. This spurs jealousy, feelings of inadequacy, and despair. She furthers her promotion of free love by stating, “The wish of a woman to belong fully to a man is a slightly lower and less connected version of the wish to fully love and recognize a person”(241). Thus, connection with the earth and all her belongings creates a true love of others.

            This really resonated with me. I recently broke up with my boyfriend without really knowing why. I knew that I loved him and I knew that he loved me. Still,  something was wrong. He was generally kind and caring, but would sometimes erupt with feelings of anger and inadequacy. These bouts of emotion had extremely intense effects on my well being. I would find myself drowning in the dark vibes, feeling all that he felt, heartbroken long after each individual event had ended. I fell into paranoia, thinking he was always mad at me. I realize now, that this behavior stemmed from his attempt to own me. He loved me the wrong way. His passion urged him to keep me to himself. When his subconscious forced him to understand that as a human and a free spirit, I was impossible to own, rage would well within him. He would then try to hide these feelings, knowing that he should love me for me or fully “recognize” me instead of trying to change certain aspects so that I would be eternally his. The suppressed emotions would then lead to episodes. Like Manu and Meret in Temple of Love we were not ready for personal love. (I do, however, differ from the author’s belief that monogamy never works).

            Sabine Lichtenfels talks a great deal about Manu and Maret. She claims that their love, the first of personal love, led to the patriarchal society in which we live today. Manu’s longing to own Maret and her submission created of feelings of power in Manu, for he realized that he could act free of Mother Earth. This hunger for independent power eventually manifested in a murder committed by Manu. This only intensified his craving for individual action. Manu, thus, severed the human tie with nature by realizing individuality.

 Humans no longer act to benefit a system of a whole. This, in turn, spurs violence, hatred, and dismay. Harmful climate change for instance, is a result of individuality. People, looking for profit, caring not for others’ well beings, continue to mine, to waste energy, and to damage earth. In the short run convenience and revenue are increased. These benefits, of course, will not last. The melting caps and impending disaster will swallow up the benefits along with the human race. Every act the individual takes at the expense of the whole will haunt him eventually, for the individual is part of the whole.

Sabine Lichtenfels elaborates on the link between the individual and the whole by stating, “private therapy alone cannot bring healing… because there is no private disease”(235). This statement showcases the detrimental effects a society can have. Private disease does not exist because problems often stem from the environment in which one lives and the social mores that control said environment. A book that showcases this idea is the Feminine Mystique. For this masterpiece, Betty Friedan interviewed a variety of middle class suburban women. Most of the women felt they should be happy, but couldn’t rid themselves of a certain despondence. Many ignored their despair, feeling that their pain displayed a personal flaw. Betty Friedan found, however, that the pain of a woman enslaved in domestic duty was universal. Feminine Mystique put a name to the societal problem that plagued various individuals. The realization that the womanly pain due unequal rights was cultural and not personal spurred a movement. It is interesting to contemplate how far Sabine Lichtenfels statement can go. Are certain mental problems results of our culture? In America the sociopathic rate is one in twenty. In Japan the rate is one in one-hundred. With epigenetics, the scientific idea that certain genes are only expressed if triggered by a certain event, the idea that private problems do not exist is validated.

I was especially intrigued with Sabine Lichtenfels take on religion. She argues that the male god of christianity is angry and misogynistic. At first I was taken aback by her description, but then I realized she was criticizing certain aspects of the christian institution and not what she believed to be a “real” higher power. I realized while reading this book that a priest can call God “rock, water, whine, bread, tree,” but can never call God “woman.” To me this fact is greatly distressing. Furthermore, alters are reserved for men, which furthers Sabine Lichtenfels claim that christianity is anti-woman and thus an anti-natural institution.

Furthermore, her glorification of the snake symbol, which has always represented the freedom of women and sensuality, displayed a rare self love. It was extremely refreshing and new to see the snake/serpent showcased in a positive light. Even those that are not religious see depictions of the snake as evil in various pieces of literature. The fact that I have never seen the snake as a positive symbol, proves that our society has an ingrained bias against the freedom and sexuality of women. In this, society opposes nature.

Temple of Love is filled with wise insights. One such insight is as follows: “When I am fully in the present, I am protected from fear”(245). Fear, of course, is negative. It sucks from us the will to do whatever it is that we really dream of, leaving us empty. We often hear the question “What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?” Sadly, this question reminds many people that they are not fulfilling their wishes, for the answer, the representation of what one wants,  is usual at in dissonance with reality, what one does. Many recognize that fear is detrimental, but neither dissect its hold on them nor attempt to cure the disease. By stating “When I am fully in the present, I am protected from fear,” Sabine Lichtenfels addresses the cause and anecdote.

This statement shows that fear comes from pondering the past or the future with too much depth. It makes sense. It’s something I should have thought of before. While it is good to learn from mistakes of yesterday, it is harmful to wallow in regret. For example, those who have been betrayed by a loved one, often close their souls to avoid yet another painful encounter. For such individuals, fear of love stems from past heartaches. For others, the future spurs destruction. Of course, one must plan for future goals. And sure, a great deal of hope rests in the future. However, if one thinks only of tomorrow, fear will control them. People rely too heavily on prolonged gratification. In that I mean people ignore present euphorias for a secure future. Fear forces people to do this. A common thought process is “if I don’t work work work, and ignore all that is around me, I will not achieve X.” The solution? Live presently. It’s cheesy. It’s cliche. It’s true. Soak in the beauty within every moment, adore each second of each day, realize the miracles of life that surround you, and fear will disappear. The dearth of fear, in turn, will create a happier and healthier life.

Other advice in Temple of Loveincludes, “This is why they say ‘Love is blind.’ You look outside for what you have forgotten or betrayed inside yourself”(243). In my copy of the book, I put stars and hearts next to this statement. If we expect others to encompass all that we are not, all that we wish we were, we will constantly be let down. This is an unfair weight to put on another. Still, most of us fall into this trap. “He/she balances me out” we say. This attitude transforms love into dependence. If and individual needs someone to “complete” him, he is obviously short of something necessary to his well being. Furthermore, this type of relationship ignores the lover’s actual personality. The incomplete individual does not see his love for what they are, rather for what he himself is not. This is not true love.

Something very powerful in this book is the idea of justified and controlled anger, or “sacred anger.” In a spiritual trance, during which the author feels another’s being, Sabine Lichtenfels hears the words, “I will become the witness of the thoughts which arise from anger, and I have the task of transforming them into a sacred and peaceful power”(120). From this passage, I realized that anger often has a valid source. There are certain evils that need transformation. The resulting anger, however, is detrimental and useless. If we can separate anger from its source, we can identify specific injustices and work with a clear mind to halt the wrongs.

There were many amazing ideas and thoughts in this book. I have not yet touched upon so much that touched me. I do, however, want to share the part of the book that did not please me. Sabine Lichtenfels often talks of male and female as “polar opposites” and creates her own very rigid gender standards. I personally subscribe to the belief that gender is a social construct. I believe that soul, and not body determines an individual’s disposition and that were we free of social mores our genders would be more fluid. Sex, the biological determinant of male and female, too could be argued to be a social construct. One in seven people are born with such biology that calls for surgery in order to make an individual fall under the category “boy” or the category “girl.” With this fact, I surrender all belief in the “male/female” system. Her book was, however, most uplifting for those who identify as “women” and follow the societal ideals of today. She also painted an absolutely stunning picture of natural femininity, that,  while I don’t necessarily agree with, I respect and admire.

Sabine Lichtenfels is a wise and intensely creative woman. Her visions of the past, though not historically validated, are beautiful and meaningful. She tells a story, true or not, that lends itself to teaching.  As a growing youth, still forming ideas about the world around me and piecing together what I believe to be true, I find that Temple of Love might just have a lasting impact on my ideology. It has brought many previously unexplored ideas to me, which I am eager to think on. 

Alexandra Mayer
Published with permission

WGSS 3998 – Ecosexuality and the Ecology of Love
Prof. Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio
U Conn, Storrs, Spring 2013

Dear Earthlings:
Let “nature” be your teacher in the arts of love.  Education is the heart of democracy, education to love.  Come back for more wonders: Book Reports to appear every other Thursday.  Book Reports scheduled every other Thursday Check out our summer offerings:  Ecosexuality in Portland, OR, July 17-21.  Registration here! 
Namaste,
 
Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Gilf Gaia Extraordinaire
Author of Gaia, Eros, and many other books about love
Professor of Humanities
University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez
Join Our Mailing List
   
Follow us in the social media
Poly Planet GAIA Blog: 
http://polyplanet.blogspot.com/ 

Be Appraised of Ecosex Community Project PostaHouse 
Become a Fan: www.facebook.com/GaiaBlessings 
Author’s Page/Lists all books: 
YouTube Uploaded Videos: http://www.youtube.com/SerenaAnderlini
 

Find us on FacebookFollow us on TwitterView our profile on LinkedInView our videos on YouTubeVisit our blog  

http://polyplanet.blogspot.com